Marital Advice 101.4 Settling Into Married Life (Continued) "The Look"  101.4 f Let's say Abby and you are out for the evening with friends, enjoying a few drinks and dinner at a nice restaurant.  Everybody is having a great time and it might be said that you are the life of the party.   You glance at your wife, who is sitting across from you, and she is giving you "The Look." It is a steely-eyed, clinched-jaw scowl that means you have obviously done something very wrong, but what? It could mean, "Stop staring at the waitress's boobs," "Stop staring at the waitress's ass," "Stop talking so loud," "Stop talking with your hands, they're waving all over the place," " Stop swearing," "Stop telling the same stories that you've told these people a dozen times," "You have again spilled steak sauce on your shirt," "You are getting shitfaced drunk," ...

 Marital Advice 101.4 Settling Into Married Life (Continued) "Does This Dress Make My Ass Look Big?" 101.4e   There will be numerous times throughout your married life that your wife will ask for your opinion on how she looks.  Here's an example. Abby and you are getting dressed for your company's annual holiday party.  Abby purchased a new dress for the occasion and she will wear it for the first time tonight.  She views herself in the mirror - front, side, and rear views. "Does this dress make my ass look big?" she asks. This is a trap question.   If you answer it wrong, your wife will burst into tears, will rip the dress off, and probably refuse to go to the party.  If she does go, it will ruin her entire evening, and most likely yours as well.  Not only that, but she will remember what you said forever and will throw it back in your face at least once a month for the rest of your life. Now, there is no doubt t...

Marital Advice 101.4 Settling Into Married Life - (Continued)     Bragging Rights - 101.4c   There are few things that some married women enjoy more than getting together with other wives and having a full-blown bitching session about what a bunch of low-down, miserable, worthless, lazy, sloppy, gross, crude, barbaric, idiots their husbands are.     There is one thing that a wife likes better than that, though.  It is being able to brag on her husband to her friends and relatives about the wonderful things that he does to help out around the house.  That being the case, take the lead here and get out in front of it.  That is, pick two, three, or four things to do around the house that will surprise and please your wife and astound your mother-in-law.     Your New Best Friend   I highly recommend that one duty you volunteer to handle is vacuuming the carpets and floors.  Here's why:  There is som...